I want you to kiss me
As much as I kiss you
I want you to hold me
As much as I hold you
I want you to need me
As much as I need you
I want you to miss me
As much as I miss you
I want you to want me
As much as I want you
I want you to love me
As much as I love you

And boy.
You make my dreams come true.


Yours truly.

I


love


him.







And I always will.

Voices,
I can hear them screaming.
Arguments. I'm there to witness them all.
Anger. Sadness. Yelling. Tears.
I feel so alone.
I want to be with him so bad right now.
The one who makes me happy, the one that always makes me smile.
No matter what, he's there for me.
But I can't see him right now.
And it's killing me.
I feel so alone in the evening.
Can't wait for the next day to come.
Want to be with him.
Hug him. Kiss him. Love him.
Look at the stars with him, how they're shining so bright for us.
I want him to kiss my tears away,
And make me smile again,
Like he always does.
He's my sweetheart.

I'm his truly.

5.
And counting.








Yours Always.
<3

Hmmmm.
I feel really fucked up.
It feels like I’m trapped in my own house..
I want to get away from here, I can’t stand it anymore, it’s driving me crazy.
Parent’s are trying to screw up every single fucking thing for me..
Everything I do right now, is because they want me to, otherwise it’ll have a negative consequence for me. They’re forcing me to do what they want me to.
And they say it’s all my fault. This would all be solved if I’m happy with them and what they want me to do. So basically this will all be over when I’m ‘normal’ in their point of view. And because I’m not they say they can’t stand me anymore, don’t know what to do with me, think I’m doing everything I do just to hurt them. They say I’m arrogant, egocentric, dumb etc.
And I’m trying my hardest to do what they want. But I just don’t want to give up certain things. I can handle going out once a month and that kind of stuff, but seeing Jorn as little as I do drives me crazy.
And this is supposed to be my life right? They say I’m running through it in stead of walking, and that if you run the possibility of falling is bigger whenever running. But am I not supposed to fall? To get up again, and learn from my own mistakes? I want to live my own life, but until I’m 18 I have no chance of doing that.
And I’m starting to get weak. I’m starting to think that if I’ll just do everything they say all the fights, tears, difficulties and so on will be gone. But I know that isn’t true. It’d make them happy, but it wouldn’t make it any better for me. I can’t be happy with what they’re willing to give me. I want more. And they say I’m a spoiled unsatisfied brat. But what I want most, is just to live my own life, make my own decisions, feel happy.
I’m sick of thinking about this, writing about it whatever. So I’ll just stop now and leave you knowing a bit of what’s going on in my life right now.
Must say I love you all.